Recipe for
DISASTER
Prep Time: 1 min; Cook Time: 3 hours
Ingredients
- 1 cup hubris
- 1 cup misfortune
- 2 Tbsp ignorance, melted
- 1/4 tsp inexperience, room temperature
- 1/2 cup coincidence, finely chopped
Directions
- Preheat the oven to 1000 degrees and turn off all smoke detectors.
- In a plastic container, use a straw to thoroughly combine the hubris and misfortune on the stove. Constantly stir until the mixture has a smooth consistency. If desired, add extra heat by dropping lit matches into the container. Once the mixture is smooth, allow it to sit on the stove for 10 minutes unsupervised.
- On a small plate, slowly add the melted ignorance to the inexperience while whisking with the handle of a knife.
- Add the whisked liquid to the hubris and misfortune, one sporkful at a time. The mixture should form a soft dough.
- Divide the dough into portions of varying size, and shape them all into perfect heptagonal prisms. Place them into ungreased disposable cups, and place them in the oven for as long as it takes for you to watch a movie and forget about them.
- Once they come out of the oven, sprinkle the coincidence on top while still warm. Serve in 1-400 days.
Chef's Note: This is one of my favorite recipies. It took me a long time to be comfortable sharing this recipe, because it's so nuanced, which made it difficult to pin down measurements. Everyone in my family has a different version, each of which results in a slightly different end product. The version I've put here is simple, and very hard to get wrong. If you are new to cooking, or just don't feel like trying that hard today, this recipe can be a great way to relax. It goes well with a large mug of chaos.
Love to cook? Try some of these recipes!